I am circumscribing a part of my vague feelings that followed as your thought provided me a break from a tiresome reading. This is not intended to melt you over a passionate articulation of my intense feelings, neither I believe your core is malleable in the first place, rather more of it is an apologetic revelation the relevance of which is subject to your own disposition on what is shared between us, about which I know little. So without caring what you think, without caring how you want things to move from here on, I am trying to clear the air off the smoke so that you can see in case you have not been able to. If there is nothing in your heart for me, its ok, that’s all fine. Again, this is not to influence your stand in any way. Have no regret if, in the end, you happen to know that someone had a fresh stream of affection seeking its conclusion in your convivial heart. You stand vindicated of all moral compunctions for I know it’s never a fault of a flame.
You have always been friendly to me, but it is the eccentricity in your behavior that led to figure out for its very reasons. This is something I have retained from my mechanical engineering experience.If your sudden change in behavior is normal and is a course that usually happens before an impending marriage and you find it an annoying thing than sorry to unfold this ugly chapter (and u have my ashirwaad too), either way it is highly unlikely that we are going to meetagain.But if it is because of a disappointment that I could not give words to the sentiments u had sensed long ago, or you waited long for me to do better so that you yourself could initiate but I failed, or that u made a folly of being fond of such a stupid and worthless boy that I am, than I deem this time when you are soon going to separate from us forever fit to reveal that I loved you more than anything else in the universe.
I mightn’t have been frequent in calling you but I fashioned your image out of my imaginations every evening, Sometimes used to kiss (only on cheeks). I could never put that straight to you because you considered me a good friend and so did I behave. Also, I never wanted to shrink the latitude a person with a beautiful heart like you must enjoy. There are so many parameters on which I felt tiny before you and in the face of all those I could never expect anyone especially like of you to like me who didn't like himself.
Still,it is not as much painstaking for you as it is for me after all it is an end of the world I dreamt in which we were set to live together.Loosing someone for whom you have immense warmth and concern is not easy. Be known that every single moment I was with you I was humble in your respect.
So before time stretches the gap between us so much that mere a talk becomes a formal obligation, before your worldly occupation dilutes the chemistry we once had before the auspicious day when you will become some one’s.I, with utmost honesty,tell you that every particle that I am composed of desires you. My every longing emerged from you and submerged in you
I don’t want anything from you, you know me, have I ever? I am afraid and embarrassed to write this to you. You should better choose to forget it as nonsense than be bothered. But if u find some merit in this if u had a faintest of feeling to be with me than please be acknowledged that I lovedyouvery much and loosingyouissomething I am going to repent all my life and have no doubt while whispering to yourself that weird boy who you were friendly with as you were with anybody else , that worthless mischievous boy who blindly followed his naïve interests, that boy who had a hard time ironing out his past wrinkles loved you to the threshold of impossibilities.